Web Resources

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Coping with Grief During the Holidays

"Grief is a journey we must each take in our own way and time."

Decisions, Decisions...

Do we want to put up decorations or send cards?
Will we exchange gifts?
Are there new ways to honor our loved one during the holidays?
Will we attend religious services?
Do we plan to attend or host a holiday dinner?
Who do we want to spend this special time with?

"When we lose a parent, we grieve the loss of our past; when we lose a spouse, we grieve the loss of our present; and when we lose a child, we grieve the loss of our future."

The Weight of Grief

It's normal to feel some dread, fear, and increased grief as holidays approach. Pushing ourselves to do more than we have the energy to do to keep the peace can lead to exhaustion and emotional fatigue. Don't be surprised if feelings of envy or jealousy arise by seeing what others have.

A statue of a human figure on a bench, hunched over, with the center of the torso missing

Coping Skills

Ways to remember our loved ones and care for ourselves:

Take time to connect with other individuals through grief groups and social events.
Actively ask for and accept help.
Do something in their memory — volunteer, donate, go to a special dinner, or send cards.
Make healthy choices for yourself — eat right, exercise, and participate in activities you enjoy.
Don't judge your feelings — they are simply that, feelings, and are neither right nor wrong.
Create a scrapbook or journal about the person.
Focus on setting small goals and solving immediate problems.
Acknowledge you are in the grieving process.
Give yourself grace. It is okay to do some things differently this year. Traditions can survive a break.